the end of summer seems to be coming too quickly. august is the month of preparation. i don't have much to look forward to until autumn. by this time next month, i'll be saying goodbye to my best friends. all of the people that keep me grounded will be hundreds and thousands of miles away. i'll be stuck here, trying my absolute hardest to keep myself sane through this last year of school. despite the thought making me feel sick, i'm trying to find some positives. i'm planning on undoing all my wrongs. someone very close to me came to me and told me how sad it made him to watch me burn out. i guess that was his way to help me put a name on it. this entire summer has been a strange one. i've done things i never imagined myself doing. for a while, i had no idea where i stood on anything. everything was blending together, including myself. i want to take the next year to get some kind of job, start saving up as much money as possible, put more effort into school and try to enjoy my last year in newark. sometimes getting to the places you want to go means going through the shittiest route there is. for me, that's working in a place that depresses me, going to school in a place that disgusts me and surrounding myself with people that intensify all of those feelings. i'll give them all one more shot. but this time next year, i'll be in brooklyn or philadelphia or boston or wherever else i fall in love with with the people i love doing the things that i love. what more could i possibly ask for?